How to Prepare Your Child for Nursery: Practical Tips from Lucie at School of my life

How can you prepare your child for nursery so that morning drop-offs don’t turn into tearful dramas? We’ll share tried-and-tested tips for both preparation and settling in.

I’m mum to four-year-old Sárinka and six-year-old Samík. Out of all the options, I chose a traditional state nursery with mixed-age classes. I paid a lot of attention to preparing for this important step in my children’s lives, and I’d love to share how it all went—so that nursery can become a place your children look forward to too: new friends and new experiences.

Stay positive

It’s important to talk to children about nursery in a positive, realistic way, and to avoid that classic parent “nursery scare tactic”, so they don’t start seeing it negatively or feel afraid to go.

Before and during the nursery year, what worked well for me was acting out certain situations with Samík using Lego. We played “nursery” with the little figures, copied the nursery day routine, and I even made up different scenarios. Then we worked through them through role play (for example: someone takes my toy, I can’t do up my coat, a friend hit me, I miss Mum/Dad …).

When preparing for nursery, children’s books on this topic can be a huge help. They make it easier for children to imagine what’s waiting for them at nursery—and even after they start, they’ll often ask for these stories again because they like seeing situations they know so well from nursery.

Support independence

What definitely makes nursery easier for children is how independent they are: being able to get dressed and put their shoes on with a bit of help, eat by themselves, use the toilet, wash their hands with soap, use a tissue, tidy up toys after playing… Of course, the teachers are happy to help with everything, but the more independent and self-reliant a child is, the more confident they’ll feel—and they’ll be less likely to end up in situations where they feel incapable.

You can also make getting dressed and putting shoes on easier by choosing the right clothing and footwear.

• Velcro shoes are brilliant, as are slip-on slippers (definitely choose soft ones—children often sit back on their heels while playing, and stiff slippers are uncomfortable)
• make sure joggers/leggings aren’t too tight around the ankles
• choose a hoodie your little one can easily pull on/do up
• for outdoors, trousers without fastenings are ideal, plus a coat with a big zip pull
• swap tights for leggings
• lay out clothes in the cloakroom in the order your child will put them on
• spare clothes in their locker are a must
• choose the outfit together the evening before
• for labelling clothes, I found a fabric stamp worked really well

Morning drop-offs

What parents tend to worry about most is the morning drop-off at nursery, which can sometimes come with tears and children not wanting to go. Children often try to persuade you to let them stay at home. From experience, my advice is: don’t do it (everyone told me that too, but I felt like I knew best). Children remember it very well. Samík tried it again a few times later and would say: “But remember when I cried loads once and you let me stay at home.”

One tip for children who cry: don’t carry them into nursery and don’t cuddle them in the cloakroom by picking them up. It becomes much harder for them to separate from you. Instead, take them by the hand, or kneel down to their level and give them a hug.

Settling in

For us, settling in went without any major issues. But because last year lots of mums reached out to me who weren’t so lucky, I asked my followers for help and put together a few tips that can support children—although in most cases, time is the biggest help:

• a promised reward (a trip out, a treat, playing together…)
• a gradual settling-in period (slowly increasing the days/hours spent at nursery)
• explaining the reasons why they go to nursery
• a favourite toy or cuddly
• organic Bach flower remedies
• draw a little heart on both your hand and your child’s; when they feel sad, they can touch it and it connects them with Mum/Dad
• be honest with your child, respect their feelings, and always stick to what you agreed
• go to nursery together with a friend/next-door neighbour
• meet up with a nursery friend outside nursery too
• create a goodbye ritual (high five, a little rhyme, a song…)
• a tiger temporary tattoo that gives courage
• a photo with family members
• routine and consistency, so your child knows what the day will look like
• reassure your child that you will come back for them
• let your child cry it out in your arms (sometimes emotions need to come out)

Children cry because you are the most precious thing in their life, and when they leave for nursery they’re afraid of losing you. Be understanding and try to comfort them.

Communication is always the key to success

When we got home, Samík was always thrilled to be back with his toys and would usually go straight off to play, which I was happy about. What I liked less was that he started taking out some of his frustrations on Sárinka, which he hadn’t done before. Most of the time it was a reaction to something that had happened at nursery.

I always repeated to him that if someone does something he doesn’t like, he needs to speak up straight away and make it clear he doesn’t like it. He picked up lots of not-so-nice things from children at nursery (backchat, provoking, pulling faces) and then tried to use them at home too—which was a real test of patience for all of us.

You need to get used to the fact that once your child starts nursery, they’ll be influenced by people other than you—and that’s simply part of life.

Children keep their emotions under control at nursery, and when they come home—to a familiar environment, to safety—they let those emotions out. That can be tough for everyone. A few times it happened that the children argued already in the cloakroom or in the car, talked back, or simply didn’t listen. It hurt, and sometimes I had to take a moment to process it—but it’s important not to take it personally and to tell yourself: “It’s just a phase.”

Lucie @schoolofmylife

First and foremost, mum to two young children: Samuel (6) and Sára (4). I graduated from the Faculty of Education at Charles University, and my education strongly influences the content I create on social media and on my blog, where I’ve been active since Samík was born.

Where to next:

• How to handle starting nursery without unnecessary stress
• Barefoot shoes for school – from trainers and wellies to indoor shoes
• PODCAST: Bc. Edita Prošková and Bc. Hana Tonarová: Balance bikes and ride-ons